In Memory of Memories..

For the last few days i had not been in any mood to even talk to anyone. I just wanted to stay alone in my room and have just silence as company. I was depressed. The worst i had ever been; may be i had changed, may be something was wrong with me, but whatever that was...it hurt.
I was just looking around in my room so that i could distract myself from suicidal thoughts and suddenly one thing caught my eye...it was a photo. My childhood photo, my school group photo, Vth A section,VTConvent. I was not smiling(i still dont know why),nor where those who were standing close to me. But there was one group in the pic that was not just smiling but laughing, and that too in the weirdest possible manner they could, i could not help but laugh looking at that photo as i could see the ease with which laughs could spread in a group when everyone was silent and just 10 yrs old!!
That was more that a decade ago, when i didnt even know the spelling of depressed. Single 'S' or double.?? i wish i was in school again...

School...when every morning i woke up late,dressed up as fast as i could after the world's fastest bath, and ran like hell to reach before 7:10am. As always, i used to reach at 7:15(despite of living next to the school)...it was then i realized that i was definitely not alone!! I always had company. And when you could finally reach in time on any day, it was then you realized that you hadn't cut the nails(so eat them up as fast as u can!!),you hadn't polished your shoes(so use the back of ur socks as fast as u can!!), Loose Socks!!(so look in ur pocket 4 the emergency rubberband!!),Tie doesn't have a knot(tie it!!!!!),The Green House badge is missing( beg for one around!!)....and after all those efforts....you would end up caught for long hair!!! I wish i was in School again....

Inside the class, you cursed the teacher for remembering the homework(of course when you didnt do that!!). And when she asked us, the best reason that still works many times...."Ma'm I did the Homework, but I forgot the copy". And as always...me and my friends continued talking....outside the class!!(coz it was the third time in 3 days my friends and I had said the same reason to the same teacher!!!) And then cursed the teacher for slapping us in front of the class. I wish i was in that class again...

In the Break: "Thank you god for the food we eat..."(a prayer that was said way faster than what was meant to be) followed by " Thank you MADAMMMMMMMMMMMMMM"(thats exactly how it can be spelled!!)
Fights were common. The one who did not obey the groups orders was ostracized from the group and no one would talk to him. Those were rules. Group rules that were subject to change...any moment. Coz if your friend breaks the rule, the rule was changed. And at any moment, a friend would be called a foe...and the very next moment...he would be a friend again(lack of memory may be!). Well that was the best part of childhood...many fights...many quarrels...but still no foes..all friends!!
And when the long bell struck, "Oh my god...thank you very much for the day...."
in fifteen seconds, the long prayer used to be over,and with that the end of all enmity or jealousy, ego or anger,whatever was present. By the time we walked back home, everyone was a friend again, everyone was happy again,and every shoe was dirty again...

I wish i was a Kid again...no ego...no worries...no anger..no hurries...no enemies...just a ten yr old...who never knew what depression was...single 's' or double ....