Here's to my crazy ones

It's a typical Sunday morning, i scroll through some of the old folders in my computer and i stumble upon this old picture of mine which I'd thought I'd lost long back. I look at this foto of my college days and instantly i travel back to those days when wearing a sport shoe itself would've made me feel cool. As I leave my 20s and enter another decade of renewed desires and expectations i look back at those past classrooms and laboratories trying hard to change some of me, trying hard to change some of the outcomes, trying hard to change some of the moments knowing how it could change my future forever, yet failing nevertheless.

Growing up had changed long back from being an exciting journey to an unending tragedy of wilfull misery. I don't think anyone is born prepared for this nor can anyone teach you about this. You have to experience it first hand, feel how it feels, live through the endless days and sleepless nights, make those mistakes, yet survive nevertheless.

I've come a long way from where I started. Long away from the mist of my homely air cooler, long away from the shores of my mother's shadow, far away from the depths of my unkempt room into the unruly darkness of a corporate jungle. From a time when hours meeting friends went by in a jiffy, I've come far away into a time where every second in a meeting feels like a decade. From a time when an hour of Tom n Jerry was the definition of fun, I've come far away to a time where a long weekend is just a synonym for rest. Far away I've come not knowing where i am, not knowing where I'm on to, yet believe nevertheless.

In all these years i know I've lost a lot of friends. While I felt myself drifting away from my own self, i didnt realize I've pushed them too so far away from my life that i know it'll probably never be the same again. Most due to my own stupid misconceptions, misunderstandings and a whole lot of misguided overthinking. All I'm left with now is a bunch of timeless memories which i somehow preserve in the lockers of my unkempt mind and a whole set of ageless moments which i use to come back to life when i find myself emotionally dead. In an attempt to be independent in life I've made myself dependent on these bags of memories which I can control myself, yet surrender nevertheless.

Almost each one of those long lost friends is soon turning 30 just like me. To each one of you i thank you for being a part of my life. I would've drowned in my own stupid misconceptions, misunderstandings and a whole lot of misguided overthinking had i not had such good old pictures with ye all for me to come back to life. To each one of you who stayed behind, who helped me know my mistakes, who lent me a hand when i tripped myself into a well, who lifted me up, wiped my sorrows and helped me become what i am today, here's to another decade of hope, survival, belief and mindless surrender to memories. In my binary world of haves and have-nots, in my binary world of data full of zeroes, here's to my crazy ones.